Today's prayer and dreaming BIG.

May He give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed. 

[Psalm 20:4]

Lord, I know this verse does not mean all will happen according to MY plan... but I do know that the more my desires begin to reflect Yours, the more my plans will resemble Yours as well. I am still trying to work out in my head and heart the interplay between ambition and contentment 'in the now'-- give me wisdom and guide my thoughts as I think through those things-- BUT I do know that You desire to give us good things, and You are pleased when we walk by faith and dream BIG for You... putting those dreams into action through lots of prayer and 'trust steps' in Your name. I don't know where You are calling me to be come the end of December when my commitment to Mercy Ships is through, nor next fall at the start of the school year (grad school?), nor in 5 years, nor in 20 years. Yet, I am confident You have placed me here on the Africa Mercy for today. As You provided for me yesterday, You will provide for me today, and tomorrow. As You guided me through yesterday, You will guide me today and forevermore (Hebrews 13:5,8; James 1:17; Malachi 3:6)! Embolden my faith and open my eyes to Your works each day, to all You do “behind the scenes” that I miss far too often in my 'busyness' or self-absorption.

I have many (vague) dreams-- mostly blurry images and pieced ideas in a loose framework. And sometimes often, I consciously divert my thoughts away from those dreams because I am worried they represent a discontentment with the 'now', too much of a focus on my plans rather than Yours, or because they seem too distant or impractical. I think that diversion also occurs because I am scared of dreaming BIG-- scared of disappointment or worse still, failure. Afraid to pursue something that would require faith every moment, that from the inception I knew I could not do on my own-- even if I mustered all my strength and utilized all my skills.

Ambition is a great thing as long as it, or what you are striving for, doesn't become an idol (from experience, this is very hard to avoid!). I think of Moses, Esther, David, and Joseph-- all who rose from meek positions to accomplish great things (For You! Not to elevate themselves!) that they probably never believed possible. They weren't perfect by any means, but they BELIEVED in Your power, dreamt BIG, and walked by FAITH. And oh how You led and used them! You did not have to use them to accomplish Your plans, but You chose to-- largely, I think, because they made themselves available to You: they were obedient, patient, humble, courageous, malleable, hopeful, and willing. Cultivate those characteristics in me. What would be said about me in the “By faith” chapter of Hebrews (Ch. 11)? Right now,  I am ashamed to say that it would probably be a pretty brief blurb. Maybe even a mere footnote. But, You are faithful even when I am faithless (2 Timothy 2:13). You do not lose hope in me, and You have promised to finish the work You started in me (Philippians 1:6). So work away! Don't let me and my foolishness and my limited perspective get in the way. Build my faith; give me courage and discernment to DREAM BIG!